Part 10? Blimey, I didn't realise there was so much to talk about!
Well, yesterday was the pre-operative consultation. The chance for us to be quizzed about other health issues, to be told what to expect and to ask all the questions that have been troubling us since the diagnosis. I think the idea was to reassure both my wife (on the finer points of the procedure) and myself (on the finer points of the recovery process) but, somewhere along the line, I lost the reassurance part. This didn't happen at the time but, as time passed after returning home, it just seemed to ebb away as the thought processes caught up with me.
The doctor was very pleasant and friendly, the Staff Nurse was efficient and to the point but definitely not rude. The news that my wife is likely to be home by the Wednesday night was a pleasant surprise and the description of the following few weeks as 'Hotel Rest' was amusingly good. But, as I was taking the dog for a run at a local park, doubts started to creep in. As I ran over the 60 minute consultation in my head, comments that were thrown into the mix and lost at the time, re-surfaced. As an example, a passing reference to 'Melony' being sent for a biopsy was left as if there was nothing to be concerned about. I don't know how quickly these things are done but, having had the procedure described as an 'emergency admission' due to the rapid growth, I can only assume that any tests will be carried out at the earliest opportunity. This could mean a delay to the discharge if it is malignant but, as they said it was likely that she would be home on Wednesday, as far as she is concerned, she will be home on that day. Nothing was said about post-operative treatment should that be the case. It was almost as if they were keeping that from us.
Now, I might be looking at this a little bleakly but, when examining my wife, the doctor mentioned that she wasn't sure which side the growth was attached to. We joked that maybe this was due to it shrinking / disappearing. We were brought down to earth with a veritable bump when she informed us that it was because is was even larger now and was across both sides! I don't know about 99% of the World but, to me, that is frightening.
I must now gather myself for work and for being at home and supportive (something I very nearly failed at last night) and not try to think of the outcomes at this stage. Monday is the date for the op and, until then, there is nothing we can do. All we are required to do is, on Sunday, wash my wife down with and antibacterial wash then, on Monday morning, repeat the anti-bacterial treatment and stick a syringe in her stomach! This is a new one on me, we now have to administer a sort of pre-med ourselves! This could be interesting as I have a morbid fear of needles - 6' 2" and scared of a needle!!
Anyway, for now, life goes on so please, keep loving.
DR Twit - You can't eat a whole elephant in one sitting.....if you were given all of the information and possible outcomes/scenario's/ suggested treatment options in one sitting/all at once.....you would not be able to cope with that amount of information and related positive and negative range of emotions which may result. Can you imagine the the range of scenarios you might imaging with all that information......look at what you are already imagining!!!
ReplyDeleteTake each step one at a time and cross each bridge as you get to it. Focus on the now and the facts that you know for sure and don't deviate from that other than imagining the most positive outcome. And if the next bridge/step isn't as good as hoped....use the same process - those facts and the best outcome for that....and keep going with that. Whatever you do - keep the faith!!
Lots of Love - you are in our thoughts - J xxx