It never ceases to amaze me how the body has a natural mechanism for ignoring problems if there is something bigger going on. I mentioned one example in my last post regarding the brain only handling one major pain at a time - thus, I am guessing, giving the injured person a chance to cope - well now I have another example.
Today I went to the docs. Nothing major (I hope) but, over the last 12 months, I have been having intermittent issues with my shoulders. Pain issues that have sometimes made even rudimentary actions such as turning the wheel in the car extremely painful. Well, during the period that my wife has been ill, I know it has been there but, and this is not a suggestion that I have been manfully ignoring the pain, my brain seems to have been registering it, letting me know it hurts, then filing it away for future reference. Thinking back, it is quite surreal. I have felt the pain, I have reacted then, it seems like it has been logged away like some distant memory that occasionally peeks over the wall only to disappear as soon as you look in its general direction. The upshot is, a bunch of anti-inflammatory drugs and I have to go for an x-ray. My big concern (and remember, I am the biggest wimp going) is that it will turn out to be arthritis. Those that know me are fully aware that I am unfit. However, one thing I have always prided myself in is my strength of arm and leg. I can lift and push things far beyond my capabilities whilst never having the ability to run more than 10 seconds without running short of breath. If this insidious threat comes along, whilst not life threatening, will completely change how I live my life. I think I have had enough 'life-changeing' things happen during the last 12 months and frankly, any more can bugger off and go find someone else to play with.
Of course, this is the bleakest of outlooks. I have had enough experience recently of thinking the worst and being proved wrong - long may that continue but, even the most positive person has to reach a point when they say enough! All I want in life these days is an interesting and stimulating job (tick), a quiet home life (tick), a little time to play stupid computer games (half a tick), the odd chance to do some more theatre (tick occasionally) and good health (that's where it falls down). Is it too much to ask?
It has just occurred to me that, when I started writing this post, I was just adding some more detail to my blog and wasn't going to write much. Now it has turned into a rant that makes me sound like a selfish hypochondriac! I hope that is not the case but who am I to say? That is the joy of posting and allowing others to comment. They don't hold back. I might not like what they say but I'm sure it will make me stop and think (before I delete the worst!!).
And breathe.....
Well, back to calm self so time to sign-off.
Remember - keep loving.
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